A Pretty Little Conversation

I got a call from Miss J’s first grade teacher a couple of weeks ago. “Nothing to worry about” – she informs my answering machine… yeah… right! It took a several calls and a couple of days for us to get a hold of each other and finally we were talking face to face in the school hallway. She wanted to inform me of a small cafeteria event that had taken place. Apparently when one of Miss J’s very good friends’ class was dismissed, my overly-affectionate daughter went up to her friend and kissed her good bye. I was informed it would be best for her to keep her kisses at home and not at school. I wasn’t overly concerned (since we are good friends the kiss-inflicted child and her family) but promised I would have a little chat with Miss J about her kisses. Mrs. First-Grade Teacher (whom I love, by the way) then proceeded to tell me the true cause of her concern. In that cafeteria filled with first through third graders, seeing my daughter kiss another girl in a friendly jester, caused a ruckus of sorts where Miss J was then teased and called “gay”. Can you imagine?! Mrs. First-Grade Teacher didn’t think it had affected Miss J much, as she simply thought she was getting a little attention, and wasn’t at all embarrassed by their comments, but that she worried that if it were to continue she may get a reputation and not be able to live it down. I was shocked. My little girl has no clue about gays or lesbians, and yet here she was being affronted by little kids in a situation her teacher thought may eventually cause a need to transfer schools! I have since talked to my sweet loving Miss J and she promised no more kissing her friends, and without going into too many details, she was completely oblivious to any malicious remarks that may have been thrown her way. Her innocence is maintained and her reputation intact. First grade people!

So after my little talk with the teacher I fetched the boys (who were by now soaked from playing in the water fountain) and we headed down to the evil cafeteria to say hello to big sister. Mr. T turns to me and asks why I was talking for so long with Mrs. First-Grade Teacher. I told him I like to talk to all my kids’ teachers. He then asked if she was my friend, to which I responded yes. Next came the “why is she your friend?” So I went through a series of good-friend characteristics that I felt fit Miss J’s teacher. Mr. T wasn’t impressed, “But do you think she’s pretty?” he wanted to know. “Do you?” I responded with a smile, catching on to his interest. He shrugged his shoulders with a shy smile on his face and then made a suggestion, “I think you should have your friend over to our house sometime.” Great. My first grader is facing homosexual taunting, and my preschooler is in love with a 30-something year old woman whom he has added to his valentine list. What happened to childhood?