Lest I forget

His cyclical fevers are one of the factors that induced our decision to homeschool Mr. T. He and I are on the same cycle, and every 28 days I'm reminded how fragile our bodies are. While chocolate can cure my monthly side-affects, we still can't cure my little boy from his mysterious illness. And yet it could be so much worse. Really, we are so blessed.

I watched the movie "Freedom Writers" last night and was so incredibly moved. Words cannot express the emotions that filled me as I was sucked into the reality that still exists for many. Not only do I feel blessed, but inspired to do and be more and make a difference. It was a shocking film, yet testified of what I have always felt and believed: we are all God's children, and He loves us. Really, we are so blessed.

Premenstrual Syndrome

Last night it hit. I hate that. It depresses me just knowing that it’s gotten a hold of me and won’t let me go and demands to run its course. It’s like giving birth, but the bad part of giving birth, where the labor gets so intense that you feel that you no longer have any control over your own reactions to your own body, and you don’t want to go through it any more. I hate PMS. I hate what it does to my already unstable feminine emotions and trippy temper. I once heard or read somewhere that they wanted to call it Mad Cow Disease, but the title was already taken. I hate to holler defeat when it comes to women and our nobility, but those few days of Probable Mental Sickness where I am an absolute Poor Mother Showcase grant me a big fat loser award each month. My thoughts are awful and negative, and nothing can possibly go right, I get the greens where everyone is better than me and I have nothing at all going for me… not even a silly undergraduate degree – I mean, come on (Possible Meltdown Starting), everyone out there has one of those; they come in the paper towel aisle in WalMart, right? Please Make me Stop! I can’t help it though, I am Pissed, Moody, Sarcastic and a disgrace to myself and womanhood in general. Please tell me you all go through this and hate it and wish that at some point in time a man could suffer through it as well so he could truly understand and then maybe even make it disappear. All right, that’s enough, I need to Pause, Meditate and just Stop.

Sick Mommy and Mummies

I seemed to have caught myself a small stomach bug. Yesterday afternoon I was in the depths of despair, or at least glued to the couch or the toilet seat to throw up. Thankfully the boys played quietly and even did some school work on their own and the baby napped longer than ever expected, which actually made me late for school pick-up. I don’t know what I would have done for the few hours between then and when Mr. Man arrived home had it not been for a loud-mouthed son (who presumably asked his friend’s mom to watch him because his Mama was sick on the couch) and a blessed neighbor who called to confirm and then trucked over all four of my kids to her house so I could sleep soundlessly and not have to rouse my aching body, and unnerve my truly disturbed belly by chasing a curious one-year old around. Thank you. Last night when the aches didn’t cease, but my heaving did, I moaned to my husband that I thought I was dying and couldn’t remember the last time I felt so truly ill. Today has been much better and though my stomach isn’t pleased with my intentions to feed it, and occasionally cramps down and reminds me to behave myself and stay away from anything yummy, I feel weak and managed a little snooze, and I know I’m on the mend. Thankfully. I walked Miss J to and from school today a little more slowly than usual, and I suddenly remembered that it was only a short year ago, that I had hemorrhaged and lost half my blood and was so deliriously weak for weeks on end that I couldn’t manage that walk at all. In fact I had to stop several times just to go up or down my home stairs. Again, I feel so thankful for my good health, even in the stomach-bug recovery stage.

For History today we were reading and discussing about the Upper and Lower Egyptian tribes and especially about the Nile River and the Nile Delta. Mr. T could really understand the concept of the constant flooding due to recent summer happenings in our state. It was interesting to us how the Egyptians learned from the annual flooding and used it to their advantage; from using the silt to plant and then building canals to store water for the dry season. Then of course we had to go outside and build our own model of the Nile River, and then… flood it! The boys had a blast, and I even got my hands pretty dirty (I know you’re shocked Mom!) So we’re learning lots and having fun together. I really thought that I would be a scheduled homeschooler, meaning I would do school at the same time for the same time everyday. I like routines and schedules. But so far, we’ve just found time here and there and gotten through most, if not all, of our daily plans. The boys seem to like having it broken up, and play time here and there throughout the day too. It’s been enough, that even my completely opposed to sitting down and doing anything educational, Little E, has been wandering over and asking to be included in more of our activities and learning. I’m thrilled.

We hit the library tonight and are excited for all the topics we chose to look into. We have several books on butterflies and metamorphosis as we’ve been growing our own caterpillars who have now changed into chrysalides and in a week or so will emerge as butterflies. Remarkably, the baby has been intrigued by these little creatures as well and will often beg to be lifted up to see and will point and watch contentedly for quite a while. Personally, I think he wants to squish them. That’s why they’re up high!

So here’s to health and homeschooling and hoping the two continue to make everyone in our home happy.

(had the include the cute little "squatter"in the dirt with his stick )

Homeschooling Affects Siblings

Homeschooling has given my baby, whom I admit I dote on, more time to play on his own. Here are a few of his talents that he has more time to hone now.

New words this week are, of course, "Oooot" = "shoot" and "Oooon" = "moon" - from his favourite book! We may have another initial consonant omiter!

Also, the four year old needed some incentive to clean and something to occupy his time, so I pulled out an old stray sock that I once upon a time I had big plans to turn into a cute dusting sock. You know, full of pom poms for noses, googly eyes, string hair... instead I told him to draw whatever he wanted, and in the end I had Luke Skywalker helping to clean my house. The great thing, is that I can throw it in the wash and we can draw and dust again next week!!!

My Hidden Identity and Potty Talk

Mr. T: "Mom, when you're being General Grievous, you can't take a moment to clean the bathroom!"
Me: "Well, then maybe Luke and Annakin should find somewhere else to pee... and not on my floor."
Mr. T: "Luke Skywalker never pees. I've seen I and II and VI and he never ever pees. And General Grievous never cleans the bathroom, so come play with us."
Me: breathing heavily and swinging the toilet scrubber at him "If you don't let me clean the bathroom, I may actually turn into General Grievous and this time I take no prisoners!"
Mr. T: slowly backing away..."You're a good General Grievous Mom. But you can clean first."

That Testimony Thing

First, a little background. Most, if not all, of you know that I belong to The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. In our church, we are asked to serve in different capacities within our church without pay, we call these “jobs” callings. I have learned through the years that these callings are not last-ditch efforts to give somebody something to do, nor given to someone just to have a vacancy filled; I truly believe in revelation and that the Lord guides people on earth, and I know through personal experience that the Lord prepares those He calls. That being said, my calling for the last several years has been to work in the Primary with the children (ages 18 months – 12). I regularly teach in front of large groups of children (sometimes 50 of them) and while I try to have fun with them and teach with a variety of methods, I always bear my testimony to them. I want them to know that I know that God lives and that He loves them, and I hope and pray that their testimonies are strengthened through mine.

Anyways, we started a new devotional technique at our house – with the new school year and all. We’ve tried a variety of things through the years, and hopefully that’s okay. (A favourite for all was with a book my sister gave me that included an item that corresponded to a scripture story or thought. We had a box at dinner time that magically held a new item each night – the kids loved it, and we had their attention for a few moments!) Our church has come out with a new manual for teaching the nursery children, and I picked one up for pnly $5.50 when we were in St. Louis. It is fabulous, and I am so excited for this to be used at church come January. It is called “Behold Your Little Ones” and is full of not only lessons, stories, teaching techniques and more, but full-page beautiful color pictures and handouts or activity sheets for each lesson. So each morning before breakfast the kids gather and we have a short (5-10 minute) devotional straight out of this little manual. Sure, the lessons are a little “young” for my kids, but they are sweet and have sparked sincere interest and brought more questions from our little ones – which results in more religious conversation. The best part, though, is that it requires me to bear my testimony with my children every day – something I have never done before. Looking into my own children’s eyes and telling them that we share love with others as Jesus did, and that Heavenly Father wants them to be happy – has brought me peace and happiness too. There is a special spirit in our home in the mornings now, and the rush is less so and peace more apparent (I only wish it stayed that way ALL day).

Yesterday as we were finishing the lesson and I was briefly sharing my testimony, Mr. T looked all embarrassed and asked me, “Why do you do that thing from church at home now?” I was confused and asked him what thing he was talking about. He replied, “That testimony thing!” It was a funny moment. He admitted he liked that I did, but he sometimes felt funny inside and wasn’t sure what that meant. I think he may be sprouting a little testimony seed right now! It was sweet.

This book only has 30 lessons… what other ideas do you have or do with your families for a daily devotional?

I should just keep my big mouth shut

It seems that since I posted these blogging safety tips, several of my friends and family have switched their blogs to be private. Perhaps I’m being egotistical in thinking I have that much influence on anyone, and the trend is purely coincidental. But regardless of the rhyme or reason, several of you have gone private. While I totally respect your reasons, can I just vent for a moment and tell you how much it sucks for me? (Insert your polite “yes” here.) I am completely lazy and totally rely on my google reader that has become a time and sanity saver. In a few brief seconds I can see who has updated their blog and then choose where to begin. There’s no clicking to favourites and scrolling down, trying to remember whom I’ve checked last… except for you private people. Inevitably I forget about you. I’m so caught up in my ease of blog checking that you escape my radar and ultimately it takes a slap in the face (or most commonly you leaving a comment on my blog and me remembering how much I want to know what you’re up to and clicking over through your profile) for me to get back to reading your blogs. So I’m opening this up to all my techy friends, and wondering if there isn’t an easier way – a google reader for private blogs or something? Or perhaps I may use my slightly non-existent influence to convince you privateers to go public once again? Or should I just shut it?

First Day of School

Summer break is officially over at our house and we actually all got up at a decent hour this morning and began our day with our traditional first day of school breakfast and took our traditional in-front-of-the-house pictures. This year Miss J chose her outfit all on her own and it was all her and her friends could talk about the last few days. Second grade scares me a bit, since I can totally remember second grade and most of what has happened since - so I can't just parent by the seat of my pants anymore, the things I do and say will be remembered. Slightly scary. So here's my sweet girl and her two best friends from kindergarten (they were all in separate classes last year and are delighted to be back together again). Yes, I know, my little girl is like 3 feet taller than the other two girls her age. What do you expect, Mr. Man and I are both at least 7 feet! She had a great day, but misses her first grade teacher sorely (I think she expected an exact replica for this year) and was quite tired at the end of the day. (It must be mentally exhausting to sit at a desk all day and write about what makes up a good listener).


It was also our first "official" day of Kindergarten for Mr. T. I feel like I talk about it all the time, but since I startled two people with the news this week (one of which was my sister), I suppose I should announce that we are now a homeschooling family and are homeschooling Mr. T. I am really excited about this and have been dipping my feet in this for quite some time, and though it is just kindergarten, I'm thrilled for the experience for our whole family. At least this will make volunteering in one classroom a breeze!!!

Little E will be doing a preschool class at the YMCA two afternoons a week after Labor Day, where he will be learning to swim and play hard - you know, the essentials. From Joy School to an outlet for his energy... who knows what next year will bring for my little sunbeam.

Baby J went for his one year appointment today and hasn't gained a pound in almost 6 months. His new motor skills have done wonders for his chubbiness, and he has rounded off quite nicely at 50% in everything. Though the Dr. insisted he was between 16 and 18 months developmentally as he pointed to a square in the room and said "yellow!" Shots were not too bad, but we've been a bit crabby and sniffly the rest of the day.

All in all it was an eventful day, and a first of many more to come!

Celebrate

I’ve put off posting a celebratory moment. My baby is now one.

I will never be pregnant again (for that I am eternally grateful).
I will never have a toothless child of mine grin up at me… though there will be grandchildren someday I presume.
And I can’t quite rid myself of those teeny baby blankets that I haven’t used in months. I suppose I’m in the denial stage, and silently mourning a passing of mothering babies.
I don’t have much time to mourn though, as I chase my attempting-to-run one year old everywhere, trying to keep track of all the toys and items my little scavenger places in obscure places – most recently his favourite dumping ground is, ironically, the trash can. His sweet smile melts my heart, even as he pushes out of my arms and says “Go go go”. As he fiddles with the baby gate and tries to get up the stairs faster than I can jump over his pile of toys he’s placed as a roadblock for me, I try not to wish these moments and this new toddler stage away. One day, soon enough, I will cry as I pass on all the blocks and balls that now threaten my sanity.

So I choose to celebrate.
Happy Birthday my little one.

Meet Me in St. Louis

We decided to meet grandparents half-way, and met for the weekend in St. Louis. We enjoyed our time together and especially the opportunity to go the LDS temple there and enjoy the free zoo too. It was a LOT of walking, and was a pretty humid day too… I was happy after just seeing the hippos, but the kids had to see EVERYTHING (even though most of the animals were hot and tired and napping in hiding)! So it was a long day and they were pretty tired out after our two days of hotel swimming and playing together.


I’m not an animal lover by any means, but I think that the hippo is my new favourite. He was so extraordinary to watch, and I loved learning all these fun tidbits, humor me while I share my excitement:
-a hippo can hold its breath for five minutes under water
-hippos ooze a pink “slime” that protects them from sunburn and also helps wounds from getting infected
-its blubber helps it to be more buoyant so it can float in water
-hippos spend most of their lives in water, that’s where they mate, give birth, play and even fight
-its ears are on the top of its head so that the hippo can be mostly under water but still hear what’s going on above… if the whole head goes underwater, the ears swivel to shake out the water when the hippo resurfaces
-the eyes also sit on the top of its head so the hippo can be mostly underwater and still see what’s going on above
-the jawbone conducts sound waves, so a hippo with its jaw submerged can hear sounds above and below the water at the same time!
-nostrils are on top so that the hippo can breath while mostly underwater, when submerged the nostrils close
-when the hippo relieves himself, his tail swishes back and forth so that the dung flings around into tiny pieces so that fish can more easily eat and digest!!!


Always a fun time with family… and I love these mini-vacays better than the week-long ones! Less laundry!

Finally!

I was born at a very young age, and have waited my whole life to turn my favourite number... and today, I finally did - I am 28! My brother-in-law asked how long I've been telling people I'm 21, but so far I relish turning older, and especially this year (though my mud pie was a bit blinding with all those 28 candles!)


I had a great day being spoiled with delicious food and special gifts, but mostly spent it like this:

My little guy came down with something, and I basically held him most of the day, while reading (um, devouring) my new birthday book. The kids were thrilled that Mommy let them play the Star Wars video game and Barbie.com (you can guess who did what) as a special birthday activity (yeah kids, whatever, just let me read my new book!) The the two boys had a birthday party to attend this evening, so Mr. Man took Miss J, Baby J and I out to Olive Garden (my favourite). It was a nice treat, and so easy with just those two - perhaps we should have spaced our kids out more :) Anyways, I remembered that last year on my birthday I was at Olive Garden too -with two good friends who have since abandoned me (i.e. their husbands have graduated and gotten jobs and moved far far away), and I was a week overdue! This year is a bit strange in that my last baby has been birthed and is now a walking/talking little boy. I admit, I cried.


So happy birthday to me... as my four year old tells me, I look like a monkey, and I smell like one too!

Future Husband

Lists... amazingly I have been all about lists my entire life! I love the feeling of checking something off... sometimes I will even write down something I've already done that wasn't written on my list, just to have the satisfaction of seeing it checked off. Lame, I know. But that's the way I am. In my Youth Conference research, I came across a list I had made years ago (when I was between 14 and 17) about what I wanted in my future husband:

In case you can't see, it reads:
good looks
not hairy
gentleman
active member
understanding
RM
creative
good job
outgoing
wants to go to the temple
put up with kids
smart
taller than me
nice eyes
fit
smile
sense of humor
knows the scriptures
good at sports
good personality

I think I pretty much got what I wanted! Check. Love you babe.

Since you asked...

First off, thank you for all of your kind and uplifting comments. How can a girl not feel a little bit amazing when everyone else says so?! Don’t worry, I was still scared enough that your “pull-ups” in no way got to my head. And now that it is over, and relief floods over me, I feel grateful to have completed the task, but in no way inspired to ever accept such a request ever again.

It went well. It really did. My husband helped me so much with all of my AV needs as I am hardly technologically able, and I didn’t have a single AV glitch – which really would have thrown me off and put a damper on my presentation. The teens were great and really got involved with me. In some ways there are a lot like the little kids I am used to working with and I think I gauged their attention spans well with enough wiggle and transition activities in between my talking. I had a little less time than I had anticipated and as I sat waiting to be introduced, watching the clock I quickly calculated what chunk I would have to leave out. I think I had some good stories, and they even laughed – whether with or at me I don’t really care. I like making people laugh.

I had the teens (about 120 of them) sit on picnic blankets on the floor (which I used for an activity, and tied into my presentation) and for a part had them choose the person from their blanket with the deepest darkest scariest voice to come up to the front and help me tell a story. Each time I pointed at them (about a dozen mostly male) they would say frighteningly “THE BIG BLACK DOOR.” You may have heard this story before, here’s how it goes:

An Arab chief tells the story of a spy who had been captured and sentenced to death by a general of the Persian army. The general had fallen upon a strange and weird custom. He permitted the condemned person to make a choice. He could either face the firing squad or pass through THE BIG BLACK DOOR. As the moment of execution drew near, the general ordered the spy to be brought before him for a short, final interview, the primary purpose of which was to receive the answer to the query: “Which will it be – the firing squad or THE BIG BLACK DOOR?” This was not an easy question, and the prisoner hesitated, but made it known that he much preferred the firing squad. Not long thereafter a volley of shots in the courtyard announced that the grim sentence had been fulfilled. The general, staring at his boots, turned to his aide and said, “You see how it is with men; they will always prefer the known way to the unknown. It is the characteristic of people to be afraid of the undefined. And yet I gave him his choice.” “What lies beyond THE BIG BLACK DOOR?” asked the aide. “Freedom,” replied the general, “and I’ve known only a few men brave enough to take it.”

Anyways, as I told them how and what they were to say each time I dramatically pointed at them, I turned my back to the volunteered for a moment and one of the kids whispers, “Let’s say it in a high-pitched girly voice instead!” Teens! I don’t know why I thought they’d be so much scarier than little kids; they are definitely just as silly. It was a fun activity but instead of sounding scary their deep booming voices made the audience laugh hysterically each time – so it was fun for all of us, if you can imagine.

I was to speak on being steadfast and immovable, and I really focused on how knowing who we are and that we are loved is vital to being steadfast and immovable. I brought up how as teenagers a lot of times we feel like we are on a quest to find out who we are, and a lot of the choices we make are based on that quest… however sometimes we make wrong choices because we have merely forgotten who we are. Then I did something I was a bit nervous about… I showed a clip from the movie “The Lion King” when Simba is confronted by the baboon Rafiki who tells him he has forgotten who he is, and reminds him that his father is still alive and lives in him and then Mufasa appears to him in the stars and tells Simba, “You have forgotten who you are and so have forgotten me…. Look inside yourself... You are more than what you have become...You are my son, and the one true King… Remember who you are.” (or something like that). Anyways, I’ve always been struck by the power of that scene and how much it makes me think of our Heavenly Father, who loves us and wants us to become as He is. Who sends prophets, parents, leaders and friends into our lives to remind us of who we are and can be, even if we have strayed and not always been steadfast and immovable. But I was also worried how teenagers would feel about this kid movie… adults are old enough to remember and appreciate, but were these teens too close to childhood for this; would it be cool, or completely lame? Well, this was the highlight, I think. Everyone laughed like Rafiki and they were all quoting the lines along with each character and then completely quiet and still for the spiritual moment of Simba’s reminder of who he really is. It was both fun and effective, and I’m glad I took that chance.

I had a lot of personal stories that I think went well, and really I feel good about it. I love to tell stories, and they seemed to enjoy them as well. And of course, being August 2nd (with Breaking Dawn coming out) I had to mention the Twilight series and do a little Edward, Jacob, Bella analogy for the crazed girls and clueless boys (and leaders!!!) They were a great group. Though in hindsight, I do felt like I tried to fit too much in to too little time. And I had total dry throat syndrome and should have had some water up there with me… bwah!

I had woken up yesterdayknowing my, ahem, monthly migraine was coming on, and so I drugged up and it didn’t hit hard until later that afternoon and I spent the rest of the day and night in excruciating pain either in bed or on the couch. I’m very grateful that I was spared that huge inconvenience. Now I need to clean my house (which I ignored all of last week) and get back to my regularly-scheduled to-do list and enjoy our last week before school starts. And I have some good mail packages to put together – a greenie package for my brother, and a baby package for my sister who had her second baby last night – a boy!!!! Yeah!!!