It's to be expected that someone who is being treated for depression and anxiety will be slightly depressed and anxious over the side-affects of the medication she is on. At least that's how it is for me. For months I had insomnia with a pill that claimed a potential side-affect of drowsiness. And yet, I am am sure that the listed side-affect of weight gain is in fact a promise. I can't tell myself otherwise.
In the fall when I severely depressed I couldn't eat anything and lost between 10-15 lbs. The irony was, that I couldn't even be happy about it! Once I went on anti-depressants, it took several weeks but I gained back every last pound I had lost without even trying. Mr. Man thought it was because I finally had my appetite back and the desire to live. A friend told me I was just probably back at my ideal regular weight. But I know differently.
I have an insatiable hunger all the time that I have never experienced before. I am always hungry, and I will eat absolutely anything - even things I don't like - to try to satisfy that need. When I try to not eat, it's all I can think about. When I'm full, I think about what I will eat next and how soon I can eat it. It has taken all I have this week to have a salad every day for lunch (to try to compensate for all my other eating!) But this isn't all I'm obsessed with, I'm also being driven mad by my scale: the scale I can't stop getting on, the scale I think about all the time as I think about what I'm going to eat, and the scale that keeps fluctuating throughout the day. Yes I now weigh myself several times a day, I can't stop thinking about it and so I have to get on to check. I used to only weigh myself at the doctors. It's a horrible obsession. And I blame it all on my pill.
Mr. Man and I are finally heading back to Hawaii this spring and I have wonderful visions of myself fitting in a bikini again - or at least a swell swimsuit. But at the same time, all I can think about is the different restaurants and delicious food I'm going to eat while I'm there. It's a problem.
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7 comments:
Being happy is way more important than being a certain size! It's worth it!
try exposure therapy and have mr. man hide the scale on you
believe me as someone with ocd obsessions and giving into them get you no where
know that i love you
little sis
funny - I read this post right before I read yours. Take a look see.
http://www.feministmormonhousewives.org/?p=3528
Sounds like me pregnant! I hate not having control over what I eat. I know how you feel. I think I'd consider changing meds if it were me. I'd go crazy if I knew I'd have to deal with this feeling for more than 9 months!
Ella really struggled with incessant hunger & food obsession because of the high levels of steroids we had her on for her brain tumor. She said that she event dreamt of eating. You have my deepest sympathy.
hi renee - i was just looking at this article yesterday that does a great job of comparing the different SSRI's...
http://www.emedexpert.com/compare/ssris.shtml
when i was on celexa i am certain it contributed to my weight gain (i gained at least 10 lbs from it) and sorry if this is TMI, but i had no sex drive whatsoever! good luck figuring it all out!
This IS a difficult side effect! Argh. Wish there was the "perfect" solution.
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