"I should have been a great many things"

I had a required one-on-one meeting with one of my professors today. We were supposed to discuss our writing portfolios: corrections and rewrites and thematic issues. I walked in and started to pull out my portfolio and she stopped me saying that I obviously know how to write and we have nothing to discuss but the weather. We had an enjoyable chat about different issues in our field and class topics, and also got to know each other a bit better. She asked what I wanted to do with my schooling and my life and I told her that I want to teach preschool or kindergarten and am excited to complete my reading emphasis to enable me to be a reading specialist for K-12. Her eyebrows raised a bit, and she asked me why I was back in school to do that. I tried explaining again how ages three to five are my favourite, my passion for increasing literacy and how much I love teaching. In not so many words she basically said that she thought I could and should do more with my life... that she expected more out of me. My first thought was a quote from "Little Women" when Jo tells a group of men that "indeed [she] should have been a great many things." I know I'm capable, I know all the opportunities I could have if I so choose... and yet after that initial thought I immediately got defensive. My biggest responsibility and opportunity, my most important life work is being a mother to my children. While I could "do so much more," for the time being I can't possibly do so and still be the mother I want or need to be. And I also realize that, to at least four little people, I am a great many things.