Hungry?

Amidst my reservations, I have been recommending a new favourite book to everyone I meet. I am dying over the fact that I keep getting myself addicted to series (how do you pluralize series?) before their sequels are written. It's a curse really. The Twilight series nearly killed me when I read the first three while on bedrest and had to wait until my baby's first birthday for the finale. This time, my obsession will not be released until August... which in my mind is a whole lifetime away. I will have to wait until I have packed up, moved across the country, unpacked (because I can't rest until my house is a home) and then wandered over to the local library to get a library card (because we will be seriously totally poor until we get our first paycheck and then until we pay off our house 30 years later) and then most likely have to wait an eternity until my name comes up on the hold list or I make a friend with similar reading interests who owns the book and will allow me to borrow it. Not that I've been thinking about it or anything.

The book, my friends, is AMAZING... and like, Twilight, seems to do no good when I try to explain the details, (here's a good review if you must know)but you really MUST just go and read it. The title: "The Hunger Games" by Suzanne Collins. Aside from the fact that a bunch of children are trying to kill each other, it's a very "clean" book with zero language (that I can remember noticing), no sex scenes (sorry) and zero homosexuality (for those still wounded by my last book choice).

Here's the fun encouraging post that made me put the book on hold at the library. I admit when the email telling me it was ready arrived in my inbox just hours after I had placed the hold, I worried that the lack of demand might be saying something. But I was proved wrong. I suffered the entire Easter weekend knowing the exact location of the book (under my couch for any quick moments of reading) trying to be a good host and enjoy having family (and really I totally did)... but the day they left I ignored all and feasted on "the book".

Read it and then let me know what you think. And by the way, I also have a birthday in August... if anyone (yoo hoo Mr. Man, are you reading this) wants to simply BUY ME MY OWN COPY OF THE FIRST AND SECOND BOOKS OF THIS GREAT SERIES. You know how I love brand new books! (I know you're buying me a house and all... but maybe...pretty please?!)

Well goodnight all. I'm hungry and have sworn not to eat after dinner. And now midnight is growing nearer. Oh the pains.

Too tired to think of a title...

Even though I am slowly being “released” from responsibilities – either by others or myself – I still feel like I have more to do on my to-do list than can ever get done before this chapter of our life closes. Of course that’s when life always throws you curve balls too. Last week our computer got a nasty virus. Mr. Man took a few days off his dissertation to combat it, and luckily (due to his brilliance and his insight into having our external hardrive) we lost very little. But I did go a few days without a computer. I know, cry me a river.

The weekend brought another nasty virus to our home – one where the kids have nastiness coming out of both ends and I am up to my armpits in puke and, um, other gross unmentionables. But my home is getting to be quite clean and sanitized! After being up all night with sickness, last night Mr. Man lovingly let me catch a few hours of sleep while he stayed up with Mr. T playing video games until 3am. It was for medicinal purposes only as Mr. T had a procedure this morning that required him to be sleep-deprived with only 4 hours of sleep. Thankfully prayers were answered and he didn’t catch the nasty virus. His MRI went well with only a few hiccups due to his inability to lay still while sleeping (I could have told you that). He needed some heavier meds which caused some breathing issues, but ultimately he did well and we should know in the next day or two if his “bulging lump” is a tumor or a cyst and then the upcoming treatment and procedure. Overall I feel quite calm in knowing that, no matter what, everything will be alright.

Right now we’re all just a little tired. I need to go add “sleep” to my to-do list!

Wish me Luck

I’ve been doing this parenting gig for long enough to realize that it not only takes a lot of hard work, but there’s a lot of luck that comes along for the ride as well. Luckily we don’t end up at the hospital on a daily basis when I let my kids climb trees. Luckily nobody threw a tantrum and were all good shoppers this morning when a nice lady let us in front of her and commented frequently on what good children I had. Luckily three of my four children are potty-trained and I have no clue as to how. And so the problem presents itself. I still have one child left in diapers. To be honest, I am very happy having him in diapers. I would be very happy keeping him in diapers until he is three. And yet, he keeps trying to let me know that he has other plans.

About a month ago, he started pulling down his pants and diaper and standing in front of the toilet on a frequent basis. I put him in overalls for a few weeks and curbed that habit. The boy pees before his bath… sometimes in the toilet, but more often on the floor as he tries to stand on his tip toes and pee in the toilet. Othertimes it's in the bath. He will often make the sign for potty and run into the bathroom, stand in front of the toilet fully clothed and (I presume) pee, flush, put the lid down and wash his hands. This past week he has told me repeatedly whenever he has to go pee or poop and has been a bit bothered with me when my answer is “do it in your diaper please.” I admit, I get a few strange looks from overhearers as well. Today was the big one though. He was pounding on the bathroom door in a fit of toddler rage. I thought maybe someone was in there, so I knocked with him and when we discovered it was empty I opened it and let him in. He was pretty frantic to get his pants and diaper off. “Poop” he muttered when I had him stand. So we sat him on the toilet and, well, he pooped. He was a bit freaked out and held onto me tightly, but he did it. The other kids were thrilled and started singing and dancing and making a huge deal out of it. So I went out to the shed and got our potty seats and little potty washed and set up. He has since peed three more times, stayed completely dry and naked all evening and dragged that silly potty everywhere around the house with him.

I’m still not convinced this is happening. And it may not. We’ve had false alarms with our other boys. Miss J was pooping at 4pm daily so she potty trained herself around 14-18months of age. The boys were horrendous and I resorted to all sorts of cruel and unusual punishments in the end when they still refused to go number two in the potty. Ugh. When people ask for potty-training advice, I have none. I’m starting to follow my child’s lead… but I also know we have a big move ahead of us, and he’s only 20 months old…and, yes, he’s a BOY! So we’ll see. But it’s been a big day at our house! Lucky me.

The Big Talk

Tonight I dropped the bomb on my daughter. We’ve been “prepping” for the “big talk” for what feels like years now. I’ve been reading all sorts of material on the subject, and even have a notebook with ideas I wanted to make sure to use (Mr. Man was a bit confused when he found this notebook – asking, “Don’t you already know about this?”). So tonight we read a book together, talked a lot about what she already knew and then started in on the most awesome secret about how a person gets made. I loved a lot of what I read from the Eyres on their Values Parenting website (we are members and so get an even better look at their “big talk”). Over all it went really really well. But I could definitely tell when the reality of what sex is really hit her. At first she thought that the bigger and better hug that a husband and wife can do was when we hold each other really tight and rub our hands on each others backs. She was hoping for a demonstration of sex… until she realized what it was. Even when I explained it using all the terminology we have been learning, she was dumbfounded, “I just don’t get it.” Finally, when I was running out of ways to explain it, her eyes popped out of her head and she wiggled all over saying the thought of making love gave her the eebie geebies! It didn’t last long however… her next comment was, “so now are you going to tell me who the Easter Bunny is?” Let’s just say it was a night for big discoveries. Easter Bunny, Santa Clause, St. Nicholas and sex. She’s feeling rather grown up and it was a positive experience for my first time divulging truth! (I’m thinking I should start a notebook for the other subjects as well!) She can’t wait to tell her best friend that she knows… about Santa Clause, that is! (Her friend has “known” for years and it’s been sort of a rift between them… one that she is now embarrassed about!) When I tucked her in, she did her eebie geebie wiggle again, and then asked me if I was ever going to tell the boys about what I had told her. She said I better let Mr. Man talk to them, since it’s way too embarrassing for a girl to even think about! She makes me giggle! It was a great night together. I can’t post half of our discussion or her reactions and comments – but my journal boasts quite the entry tonight!

speaking of games...

Last night Little E and Mr. T were playing a new game together. Little E was being a good sport, but kept losing round after round of the game that requires, mostly, chance. Finally he won a round and flew through the house announcing his feat.

"Mommy, do you know how I won?"

I admitted I didn't, but was so proud of him.
He smiled up at me, his innocent face and freckles staring up at me, and his mischievous little smile tweaked a bit as he said proudly:

"I cheated!"

At least he's honest?

Terrible Twos Game Plan

Lately I’ve had the crabbiest toddler on the planet. Given the fact that he is usually quite mellow and a smiley little flirt, the change is even more drastic. He was sick, yes. He was unusually unhappy about our weekend houseguests, yes, but now they are gone and still the crabbies are not. He is being super clingy, cry-y, demanding and utterly unrealistic in his expectations – resulting in constant consecutive tantrums. Basically, I’m annoyed with him.

I decided I needed to come up with a game plan. I needed to fill his day, and my day, in such a way that would leave little time for tantrums and boredom. Making sure he was getting enough sleep and eating (try forcing either of these things on a toddler) was a main part of the “plan”. Outside time was a must (regardless of the cold and rain), and then the list of fun-filled activities began… mostly with “get out of the house.”

Mr. Man also reminded me of the water in the sink that all of our kids used to do… how could I have forgotten? The amount of time he can spend calmly relaxing in water with scoops and boats and spoons completely makes up for the flood I find myself stepping in. Music has been another winner. And I’ve found that if I’m sitting in a corner reading board books to myself, the odds are pretty good that after his initial tantrum and anger in my direction, he will come and sit on my lap for some reading before curling up for a nap.

This morning we went on what Mr. T called a “field trip” – mostly because it was an extended trip out of our house. The library is a bit of haven but mostly a hell for a toddler. I left him throwing his tantrum on the floor while I got all the books my daughter needed for a project. No need to worry about him running off, and I could hear exactly where he was. It was actually helpful. We were there early enough that it was only the librarians and one other mother with a perfectly behaved toddler who we were bothering. So as much as I was annoyed, I feigned disinterest and got done what needed to be done. Then I read to my other son while he continued his fit and after a while he got up to calmly go work on a puzzle. Fine then. We went for a LONG walk downtown and then made a surprise visit to see Mr. Man at school. I’m loving that five point harness system in my stroller more and more as he gets older!

A bit of play time at home with his brothers, a hearty lunch and then a drive to take Little E to preschool – where I let him run around for a bit and bounce on the trampoline, and thankfully he fell asleep on the way home and transferred into his bed just fine. Ironically, we also tired out the six year old and they are both snoozing while I get to blog and relax for a few mid-day moments! Wish me luck with my game plan. Otherwise I may end up popping happy pills by the end of the week ! (Into both of our mouths!)

Good Friday

This week for our family devotionals we’ve been studying, at a child’s level, the last week of the Savior Jesus Christ’s life. Today, of course, is known as Good Friday. When we recounted the trials before Pilate and Caiaphas, Jesus being scourged and mocked and finally the crucifixion and tomb burial, the question came up: “Why is it called good Friday?” The answer I gave was neither philosophical nor perhaps even biblical, but it made sense to my young children, and it has helped me today, a day which has not necessarily been what I would call a “good” day either.

I explained that how when Jesus suffered for everyone’s sins and mistakes, that he was suffering for all the mistakes that we made yesterday, today and tomorrow. I asked them how they feel when someone won’t share with them, or says mean things to them and explained that when we say or do those things, Jesus feels that hurt as well. I told them that since today was “good” Friday we should try to be extra good so that Jesus won’t have to suffer for anything bad for us today. I also told them that we call it “good” Friday because Jesus’ atonement provided a way for us to repent and to feel “good” once again. What he did for us was truly “good” even though it happened in a sad way. It’s been nice to watch my children trying harder to be “good” to each other today.

I’ve also thought about the atonement and how it teaches dependence. I was raised to be very independent and really it’s a title that makes me a bit proud. But today I realized just how much we, as humans, really do need each other. Learning that we can’t do it alone and that we can and need to depend on others is a humbling task, but one that brings us closer to our Maker as we learn to lean and depend on Him as well. We’ve just discovered that our son has another health issue to be dealt with; nothing life-threatening, but definitely gut-wrenching for a mother. It appears he has his third health issue that is a one in a million probability. This makes my son one in a million three times over – I knew he was special… but this is a bit out of control! As I’ve had to have the patience the medical profession requires, I know that as burdensome as it can be to wait for answers and then for treatment, I really can’t heal my son alone and I need to depend on others, as well as on the Lord. Having friends who make the moments of trial easier to manage (and you know who you are) help accepting dependence while not acknowledging defeat possible.

I am so grateful for the Savior and for His gift of love for each of us. It truly is a good Friday. Let it make us good as well.

I Hate the Hunt

When I was much younger I always thought I would enjoy hunting. I have a rather large intolerance for animals and a hearty temper, and so hunting seemed to be naturally up my alley; shooting an animal the perfect hobby. I have yet to try hunting, but I'm guessing my lack of patience might be a bit of a hindrance. When it comes right down to it, it's the kill I think I would love, but not the hunt. Shopping has helped me come to that conclusion.

I have to admit that I really do despise shopping. It's just not a fun thing for me at all. Because it's not in my nature, I hardly ever randomly shop stores seeking "good deals" and so it always comes down to there being a dire need that necessitates shopping, and inevitably, a hunt. (Yes, I'm sure I end up paying more in the end than all of you "shoppers" but I'm also saving a bundle on all those "deals" I'm constantly missing out on!) Take the last couple of days for instance as I have been frantically searching for an Easter dress and white shoes for my size 10/12 dress and size 5 shoe picky eight year old. This is no easy task. And the hunt has taken me to about a dozen different stores on all sides of town; even with having been "browsing" the shoe departments for weeks. Apparently my eight year old daughter is the perfect size of a crazy hoochie mama - the dresses are hideous and way to old for her. Every dress I love comes, at most, in a size 5T for toddlers! Most shoe departments only carry girls shoes up to a size 4, but one store graciously opened up to me that by next spring they would be carrying a new girls line size 5-7. I'm sure by next spring she'll be a size 8 with my luck. So try shopping for a size 5 shoe for your little girl in the women's section. I wanted either a cute white flat or sandal - no strappy straps, she needs a back on her shoe for stability, and a heel would kill her in a minute flat. I finally found a shoe that, though not perfect, would do - and better do all summer long! Then came the job of convincing my daughter that the hoochie mama shoe she liked was really a dress-up shoe, or could be worn when she was over 16, and that really she does like the shoe I chose. Manipulation complete; our hunt a success.

As we were leaving the final store last night, I lamented to my daughter how much I truly hate shopping. She swiftly agreed, "I like having the stuff, like clothes, but I don't like trying to find the right stuff." I know! It's the hunt that we hate. But we take great pleasure in the kill.

Weather the Weather

Mr. Man called today to let me know he had received an email telling him that it would be in his best interest to attend the award ceremony this evening. He did, and we accompanied him as we did last year... except we left the toddler with some friends so we all could enjoy the event and he could enjoy his evening as well! We are all so proud of Mr. Man's accomplishments, but also recognize the hand of the Lord in helping him with all of his scholastic endeavors.

{it's a "collective effort"}

{this one couldn't quite make it - he was bored to sleep}

{good friend and co-author}

***the photographer there took about a million photos of our family throughout the ceremony, so hopefully we can get some with me in them as well sometime

I was also remembering that last year I wore a skirt and bare legs to this event - some of you may recall my shaving in the car triumph. Today we bundled up in our winter gear since it was SNOWING! I keep telling myself I need to get used to this, since we will be living in an even colder location next year, but the weather report for our new town read 54 and sunny today. Bummer.

{forsythia bushes blooming in a blizzard}

Whether the weather be fine
Or whether the weather be not
Whether the weather be cold
Or whether the weather be hot
We'll weather the weather
Whatever the weather
Whether we like it or not

Updating: Full Weekends = Fun!

I've been busy house-hunting (online only so far) and am anticipating our big move to MONTANA this summer... so it's been rather delightful to have full and fun weekends to keep us occupied as well as to help the time fly while we are sort of in limbo (the knowing but not yet going).

Two weekends ago we had great friends who graduated last year come and stay for a couple of days. The kids had a blast and I enjoyed some much needed girl time with a kindred spirit (and "Twilight" of course!)

This weekend we had cousins come for Mr. T's birthday celebration - a true highlight and a great cop-out for not having to put together a birthday party. (I've totally hit the birthday party exhaustion phase!) We had fun flying kites with no wind (a great technique for tiring out cousins who stay up waaaaaay too late together) and building with legos, legos and more legos. Then we enjoyed conferencing together with our little family after everyone left.

We are anticipating a fun Easter with grandparents, 2 aunts and an uncle gracing our small but fun-filled home!

Secret Missions and Secret Habits

I overheard another Mom at school drop off reminding her child to remember to make somebody else happy that day. It sounded so simple, but such a sweet reminder. Now, I don't know if she tells her child this every day (though I admit I'm curious), but I decided then and there to start doing random "secret missions" with my school age children. The first day I whispered with the strictest confidentiality that Miss J's secret mission was to be an extra good friend to somebody who seemed sad. The first thing she did when I saw her over six hours later was report on her mission. The next day she leaned in to me in the hall outside her classroom, eager for her mission. There was a new boy in her class (from the day before) and he was not excited to be starting a new school and class at the end of March. She had told me of tears in his eyes. Her secret mission seemed obvious. She was to try to make him smile three times. It was also April Fools Day and my sweet girl had brought some tricks (including a whoopee cushion to use on her teacher) with her. She tried and tried to make him smile, and soon had her teacher and several friend in on the "mission" with her. They only succeeded with one smile - but I still call the mission a success. It seems that "secret missions" are on fire now at our house - I love this new tradition that I credit to eavesdropping on another mother.

Mr. T asked me today if I remember his monthly fevers. I said I did. Then he told me that he doesn't think they work any more. So sweet. He has been fever free for months now, just getting a bit achy and nappy for a few days during his designated cyclical fever. He then asked me if I knew why the fevers weren't working anymore. I told him it was a miracle and that it also probably helped that he was getting older and that he wasn't in a regular school with lots of germs any more (I have to give myself some credit for homeschooling him every once in a while). He nodded his approval of my reasons and then gave one more: "I think my fevers don't work anymore because sometimes when you're not looking, I sneak. I sneak healthy food to eat so that my body will be more and more healthy." I'm not surprised. He is my green smoothie lover after all!

Who says secrets are all bad?