Stranger than Fiction

Another event took place today that only testifies to my doctor’s insistence that I be on bed rest. In fact, I’m starting to think I should probably just not get out of bed in the morning at all – and maybe life will go a bit smoother. Not to bore you with all the intimate details of my life, and mostly because I prefer to internalize them and take out all my frustrations in my journal which then enables me to lightly scope out a pretty picture of my life online----but I do have admit that I had my first car accident today. And the other vehicle was parked too.

We were on our way to the pool (which I actually never even got in because I was so shaken up) and just in backing out of my parking space with a little too much enthusiasm, I hit a parked truck. I got out of my nice new van, after uttering some choice words, and walked over to the truck and its owner (a construction worker who has been working on the siding on our building the last week or so) and thrust at him all the contents of my glove box (first aid kit and all) apologizing profusely and telling him to take my insurance information… blah blah blah. Mostly I was bawling. It was a final straw to a ream of overwhelming emotions and I let loose on this poor man. He was so nice and said he was pretty sure the headlight had already been smashed and that the scratches didn’t look fresh and that basically it was an old work truck and he didn’t think I’d done any damage. I knew he was lying and I bawled at him to please just ignore all my crying and just take down my information, because I wasn’t trying to get out of this and I was just a stupid emotional pregnant lady. That started him apologizing. About my van, about my kids in the car – yes all my kids and my sister’s four month old. Basically I walked away with the hiccups that come after nonsense crying, and not having to pay for this man’s truck to be fixed. My van will be another story. The trunk won’t open, and that’s just the beginning. Pictures will not be shown and neither will future estimates be shared. This is not the sort of thing a wife looks forward to explaining to her husband on their once a day phone conversation late at night. Mr. Man is wonderful and loving and can I just say again how wonderful he is?! (The man took my Oma and her boyfriend out to dinner last night all on his own accord – how absolutely sweet is that?!) The kids are counting down the sleeps until he is home for a visit between his work weeks, and they now want to know that since the new van is broken if they can eat in it now!

So life.

I’m not over this silly day yet and I still may burst into tears if any of you bring this up to me. But I may also burst into tears if you tell me I look nice in my maternity swim suit, or that my kids are well-behaved. Who knows. I’m an emotional wreck. I stink.

My sister and I rented “Stranger than Fiction” tonight. Mr. Man and I loved this movie. It has the numbers for him and the literary aspect for me (Staggs – you may like this too!). What gets to me is this line, and if you don’t want the movie spoiled, you may not want to read it:

“It’s a book about a man who doesn’t know he’s about to die and then dies. But if the man does know he’s going to die and dies anyways, dies willingly, knowing he could stop it, then… I mean, isn’t that the type of man you want to keep alive?”

I LOVE this line. And while some of you may question my negativity in ending my posts on a somewhat positive light, I needed this line again today. It distinguishes to me the reality of our Savior’s love for me, for all of us, and it enables me to think of Him as really the most awesome hero that could ever be – both in reality and in literature. It makes my experience today no less horrible to me, but it makes it part of a bigger picture, one in which a man was kept alive so that I can live now, and forever.

If I can just get through today…