Just Call Me Doctor

Apparently after almost six years of treating childhood illnesses I’ve merited an honorary medical degree. A few weeks ago I was at a picnic with some other Moms and kids and Little E fell asleep on the picnic blanket while eating lunch. When I realized the sound of a barking dog was coming from my son, I knew he had the croup. I called the pediatricians’ office, informed them of my son’s condition and asked for a prescription. Of course they still made me come in, and while I was tempted to steal one of those handy prescription pads for future use, I abstained and waited for my correct diagnosis to be validated and the prescription given.

Friday morning Big J woke up with a headache, a sore throat, pain in her ears, and a churning tummy. When she was still ill by Saturday afternoon I decided not to go through another night with her and made the doctor’s appointment. Since I was to accompany the boys’ to a birthday party, I wrote a note for Mr. Man with her symptoms, as well as direct instructions to “please have the doctor check her ears and run a strep test”. Apparently it was a med student on duty after hours. He checked her vitals and then my husband told him that his wife wanted him to run a strep test. The med student looked in her throat and told him he thought it looked fine. Mr. Man winced a bit, knowing the wrath of the wife, and again informed him that his wife wanted a strep test to be run. The real doctor was then fetched, a strep test run and the results positive. Two points for Dr. Mom.

This morning I woke up with a headache. I’ve been a bit weepy, especially when I realized that ALL my jeans have holes in them – a direct result of playing with my kids too darn much. I turned green this evening, completely envious after visiting a new friend – who obviously isn’t living on a student income’s home (her home is not only large and gorgeous, but built on 30 acres of a scenic wonderland). Tonight when Mr. Man came home, Mr. T informed him that “Mommy’s being mean in the kitchen”. Dr. Mom can call this one a mile away: PMS. Should have stolen that prescription pad; for now I’ll have to tide myself over with several doses of chocolate! I should be feeling back to normal in a day or two.